Month: February 2017

I hate winter.  This isn’t a new state of mind, I’ve hated winter my entire life.  I truly think I was switched at birth with someone who was supposed to live in a warm climate.  There are multiple pictures of me as a child crying in ice skates, crying in sleds, crying standing in the snow…..it’s a life long theme of hating the cold.  As a teen there were multiple excursions to the ski slopes, but to be honest the main reason was to sit in the lodge, have something warm to drink, and check out the boys.  This week we have left the grey cold skies of Michigan and journeyed south to sunny Florida for time with my sister, her husband, my step-daughter and granddaughters.

And just as I’ve always felt out of sorts in the cold, I am equally at “Home” whenever my sister and I are together.  It’s effortless.  Regardless of the location, it just feels “right” somehow.  There are 5 of us siblings (4 sisters and my brother) and whenever or wherever we gather it is uncomplicated, conversation flows, and laughter abounds.  But this visit is also in Florida and my heart soars at the sight of palm trees, the sounds of waves, and the sun shining brightly on my face.

The location was also perfect for connecting with friends for a round of golf.  Joe was a gem dragging our clubs to and from the airport.  And this being my 1st official “golf trip”, I couldn’t have been anymore appreciative of his patience and creativity in lugging two travel golf bags down for us.  We spent our first day in Punta Gorda for a round of golf.  Joe could not miss a putt and I couldn’t hit a ball off the tee over the water.  Dinner outside on the bay at Fisherman’s Village with friends was the perfect ending to a fun-filled day.  Punta Gorda is a lovely area with a delightful and charming downtown.

Joe and our brother-in-law hit the links again on Wednesday, so Anne and I headed to Ft Myers Beach.  After mentioning that I didn’t like sitting near the pier because bait attracts little fish, and little fish attract big fish, and sharks eat big fish…..we set up our chairs pretty much right next to the pier.  In defense of our position, the beach was incredibly crowded and we had our hands full of chairs, coolers, and beach bag so we planted ourselves pretty quickly when we found a cranny to inch in to.  Dolphin’s were swimming and chasing schools of fish right off the pier and one started acting odd making breeching movements and slapping his belly off the water, and then they all swam off.  We commented how odd it was and what the possible meaning could be.  I decided to take a dip into the water and walked out about waist deep.  The sun was shining, the water a little chilly and giving off a lot of glare.  What sounded like cheering drifted down to me and I’m shading my eyes looking upwards at the crowds trying to figure out what the heck they’re all excited about.  Over and over the people on the pier are shouting what sounded like a rousing chorus of awe.  Upon returning to the beach, my sister Anne is standing on the shore and I say “what the heck were they all cheering about?” and she proceeds to tell me that they were all shouting “SHARK!” over and over, and that there was a shark swimming about 10 feet away from me.  One of my shining moments of clueless behavior.  Possibly a good thing in our travels that we ran into Jesus in downtown Ft Myers.

The week included a day of “Chip & Putt” competition with Anne/Mike vs Joe/Me.  A day that started with a visit to the driving range and also included time where Anne & I became a little distracted by the cows in the fields next door.  The competition was fierce and the rewards of beer for the victors kept both teams scrambling for position.  The boys had “greenie” side bets going with Joe and I sweeping both rounds for the win.  That evening we were joined by our daughter Jessica and the granddaughters for dinner, catching up with the girls, and making plans.

 

Plans that included a day on the water for family, fishing and exploring.  The day started a little chilly, but quickly warmed up.  Fishing poles were baited and we were very successful in catching every little fish in the sea – catfish, lizard fish, and perch….this time the little fish didn’t attract the big fish.  A stop at “Picnic Island” for lunch, exploring and cartwheels.  Watching Savannah and Abby looking for and collecting sea creatures in their buckets was priceless.  More exploring, shell collecting and sand castles the next day with the girls at Ft Myers Beach.

Joe and Mike made good use of the tennis courts at their complex.  And to Joe’s dismay, Mike beat him set after set after set.  I’m thinking that since Joe had to lug the golf bags down and around, he must have forgotten to pack his tennis “A” game and cannon serve.  Our last night was spent at the Sanibel Causeway for fishing and sunset.  The fish weren’t biting, but the sunset and company couldn’t have been any better.

As always, time flies by too quickly and we had to say our goodbyes.  The time with Jessica and the granddaughters was precious and we are grateful for the technology of FaceTime to keep in touch with their beautiful faces.  As for that feeling of “Home” and time with my sister and her husband – that I carry with me everywhere I go and remember with airfare of $200 roundtrip you may be seeing me sooner than later.

It amazes me how quickly and how much technology has changed in my lifetime.  I currently am sitting on a Delta flight from Detroit bound for Fort Myers, FL.  It’s about an 1100 mile trip, flying at approx. 500 mph, at 35,000 feet altitude and I should be arriving in under 3 hours.  My first plane trip was in 1976 and I was traveling from Detroit to Daytona Beach to visit my sister Mary Kay.  There were no screens for me to watch movies or play trivia on, there were actual stewardess’ that served meals, you could smoke on the plane, and when I landed wheeled steps were brought to the door of the plane for us to disembark onto the tarmac.

This trip, Delta was excited to let us know we now have “New and Improved” snack choices of yogurt, honey roasted peanuts, pretzels and their famous cookies.  The screen on the seat in front of me offers movies, TV shows, games, music, flight information, etc. etc. etc. (And yes, I do picture Yul Brynner every time I say that). I can plug in my phone into a USB port, my skull candy ear buds have a jack to access, and I have a power outlet for my computer.  I’m watching “Deadpool” on my laptop, an incredibly stupid and hilarious movie, and trying not to laugh out loud.  And I’m thinking to myself, I kind of feel like I’ve stepped into the “Jetson’s” cartoon.

It’s all coming true….They had flat screen TVs, video phones, talking alarm clocks, treadmills for dogs, roombas for vacuum cleaners, tanning beds, and drones to take Elroy to school (well we’ve got drones, but I’m certainly not putting any of my loved ones into one yet.)  My first memory of even watching a fuzzy black and white tv image, was of the Mercury space flight in the early 60’s.  I thought it was the most incredible thing I had ever seen.  Now we have been to the moon, have an International Space station and are planning a trip to Mars.

And as I sit here speeding through the air with all my electronic technology conveniently at my finger tips, I think oh my gosh I’m 57 years old and I feel this enormous change in my lifetime.  How much change has happened in my parents lifetime?  My mom is 86 years old and my Dad passed away at the age of 83.  They were born in 1931 and 1926 respectively.  They listened to the radio for news and entertainment.  They didn’t even have TVs and if they were lucky enough to have a telephone it was a party line connected through the wall to lines outside and shared with numerous families.  My dad used to tell us anecdotes about growing up in Red Lodge, Montana with little to nothing, and about his time as a flight navigator in the Army/Airforce during WWII.  “And there I was at 10,000 feet and the pilot said jump….” We were enthralled when we were little.

So I sit here at 35,000 feet, looking down at the clouds, thinking how much the world has changed.  Propellers to jet engines, party lines to cell phones, radios to flat screens, our Electrolux vacuum we had growing up to Roombas, and all the things we take for granted in our quest for new and improved.  And yes, I’m amazed but also a little saddened.  In our quest to connect with technology, I think we lost some of the ability to connect with each other.  We text instead of talk, surf Facebook instead of reaching out in person, and emoji our feelings instead of truly bridging the gap with a real hug.

I’m guilty as charged.  As I sit here and blog my thoughts and feelings, I am as culpable as the next person.  Technology is not warm, fuzzy and loving.  It cannot hold our hands in loss or joy.  It cannot cry with us, it cannot hug us, it cannot laugh til’ we feel like we’re going to wet our pants with us.  My mission today is to not look at my phone but pick up my phone to call someone I love,  turn this computer off and go outside to feel the sun on my face, laugh with my sister, give and receive some real love.  And my hope is that you will do something similar too…..

 

Have you ever thought to yourself “I’m so happy, I have everything!”  Driving on a beautiful but frigid cold Thursday morning with blue skies and sun glistening off the snow, I had that exact thought.  I was on my way to our son’s home at about 800am to meet him, his wife, our daughter, her boyfriend, and we were all going to go out to a special crepe restaurant for breakfast.  We had discussed it the previous evening while we were visiting and having Mexican Posole for dinner that Jessica had made.

Please don’t get the impression that our lives are perfect.  Our lives are far from idyllic!  We definitely do and have had our share of not quite perfect parent moments, family lessons that have been learned the hard way, and exercises in patience that would make a sloth feel frustrated.  But I was so full of contentment on my drive over.

So many thoughts were going through my mind.  So happy that our children enjoyed each others company so much.  That they not only loved each other, but that they truly liked one another.  That my daughter-in-law and our daughter were actually friends, not a forced or strained relationship.  That Niki’s boyfriend fell into this group with ease and comfort.  As a mother it was wonderful knowing that your kids actually wanted to hang out with you, even after spending hours with them the night before.  Oh I was feeling so good and happy.  Yep, I had it all!

We all piled into Christopher truck and proceeded to head out to the crepe restaurant with Jessica looking a little green around the gills from morning sickness.  Niki began to get annoyed because apparently I was staring at her face too long. Christopher started saying how he really had a taste for an omelet and questioning whether the crepe place had omelets. Discussion ensued regarding do we really want crepes or maybe a place with full service breakfast, and several long minutes where a decision couldn’t be made.  My joking comment that if I wanted regular breakfast I could have cooked at home.  Finally settling on a coney restaurant in Flint that was full service.   Comments were made about not drinking the water, especially with Jessica being pregnant.  Then Jessica orders water and Christopher makes faces, so Jess forgoes the water and orders apple juice.  Niki can’t decide between waffles or chorizo sausage, which prompts me to tell her to go for the waffles because I have chorizo at home that she can cook.  Which prompted a snippy “Oh, so I can have that sausage now?!” from her.  And all I can humorously think at this point is what happened to my feeling of “Yep, I have it all?”

We definitely aren’t perfect and almost shine with imperfection, and I think that is one of the things I love best about “us.”  There isn’t any pretension, façade or guise.  What you see is what you get.  “Normal is boring” was a quote often heard when the kids were growing up.  Our family is perfectly flawed with acceptance and love unconditionally given and received.   And we truly do have it all……